Maybe things are gonna start looking up. I've been through who knows how many boyfriends, been in way too many fights, gotten pissed off at an incredible amount of people, but maybe things could get better.
About the boyfriends, I'll say I think I might actually have something right. I've always sort of wondered about dating humans when... even though I'm originally a human... I'm not. But now this guy named Sielic seems to be pretty cool. He even let me turn him... of course, that might've just been that lovely male logic of "if I let her do this, maybe she'll do me!" Who knows? Point being, he's a worgen now, which I think I can at least help him manage to get used to. It's neat too that he's got a ponytail. I liked Gan's, but can't always get what we want, right? Oh well. (that seems to sum up everything. "Oh well.") Ardrick saw Sie hanging around with me in the tavern and got all pissy about it. He likes to call me "his love" (which I'm not even sure if that's possible for him, since he's an elemental and technically doesn't even have a physical gender) which usually gets him a good glare and yelling at. He even followed Sie and me when we went outside to get away from him. What a douche. I yelled at him for acting like I was cheating on him or something.
So later, while Sie and I finally got to sit just with each other and chat for a while, Kalren yelled out for a scribe. I was in a volunteering mood, so I ran on over and asked what was going on. Apparently, Kal was trying to start some sort of beneficial philosophy study group, which Dantis had some questions about. Somehow, Kal was unwilling to say anything about what they'd actually do, but kept insisting that it was innocent. Didn't really help him much. So I was there writing down everything Kal said, I don't even remember why, but eventually he told me to just sneak away after they had started arguing a bit. (Kal wasn't getting heated up. Kal? Get mad? Get real...) I left the pen and paper tablet on his conveniently flat hat, then ran off to hang out more with Sie. Later though, I figured it would be just fine to go back in the tavern, so I walked in only to find that Dan had Kanta holding Kal in place at the top of the stairs while Dan yammered on at him. I ran up there to protest. It was so stupid! I mean really, Dan was getting mad at a VERY nice person, Kal, for not telling him every damn thing he had a question about. How stupid is that? I ended up clinging to Kanta's arm, refusing to let go until he let go of Kal. Kanta's pretty strong, he tried to shake me off his arm, but I'm pretty tough too, so I managed to hang on. He didn't seem to like that, nor did Dan. But who cares? I lived in that moment solely to piss Dan off. It didn't amount to much, though. I got just so annoyed and mad that I just ran out of there. Dan had been yammering on about his precious city that he spent so much money, sweat, and blood on, so I thought I'd show everyone what he REALLY cares about: his own damn ass. Sie tagged along as I dressed up a bit differently, ran into the Cathedral, placed two bombs with long fuses on them in the libraries, ran out, placed another bomb in the doorway, set it off, then ran the hell outta there. I guess that wasn't the best plan, all in all, especially since when I got back to the tavern, Elfy was there. He had been in Warsong Gulch all day he said, so when he saw my face, he immediately knew I'd been up to something. All I could think right then was Oh shit, I have a feeling it's gonna be like old times pretty soon... And I was right! He chased me down (after I had started running due to realizing I was in deep shit, of course), tranquilized me, and before I knew it, I was tied up on the ground at Dan's feet. He had a big silver cane in his hands with a ton of dried blood all over it, and I think I saw the Hounds' old insignia on it... He asked me if I blew up the Cathedral. I said yes. He told me mages could rebuild it easily, but the "idiocy cannot go unpunished." He barked at me to take off my chestpiece, shirt, whatever was covering my bare back (thankfully, my bra was allowed to stay), then smacked me pretty hard. At that second I figured I'd make it go quicker if I just fell right then. So I let him hit me down to the ground, where he kept beating my fuckin' back in. I tried to get up, but the moment I did, he smacked me down again. ((Think of that scene in the prequel to Texas Chainsaw Massacre where the crazy old guy makes the kid do push-ups and smacks him down again with a nightstick.)) After a while, though, he decided it was enough and let me stand up and get dressed again. It's so great how I stab myself in the back like that. Not only was I pissed off, I got Elfy mad, got myself a beating, Sie almost got involved, plus I doubt I helped Kal any. Great how that happens. I just know I'll be the death of me!
Friday, February 29, 2008
Friday, February 22, 2008
Nide Returns!
Two words: NIDE'S BACK!!!! I was riding from the park over to the cathedral district, y'know on that bridge there, and he was just kinda standing there! Nevermind how he got there! Point is that he's back! And I didn't believe it at first. I was sniffing the air really carefully and even asked his name. He said "Nide. Have you forgotten my name to time?" Instantly, I jumped off my horse and hugged him, saying "Where the hell have you been?! I missed you!!" He coughed a bit when I hugged him. I guess he's a bit... fragile? I'll use that word. Or just not fully recovered from whatever he was gone for. "I'm sorry about all that, all I will say is that I had been away resting." I assured it was alright, though I wasn't too satisfied with that answer, but I was too busy still trying to believe that he was actually back to complain much.
That's when Jorn rode by. That's when I started to worry. I knew it would be bad if Nide ever showed up again after being away, since I'd not only been with Xzorn but Jorn, too, but I never planned what to do about it.
So eventually Avenn showed up and talked to Nide, too, most of what he said I didn't pay attention to, though, since I was too busy worrying about what I would say to explain myself.
That's when Jorn rode by. That's when I started to worry. I knew it would be bad if Nide ever showed up again after being away, since I'd not only been with Xzorn but Jorn, too, but I never planned what to do about it.
So eventually Avenn showed up and talked to Nide, too, most of what he said I didn't pay attention to, though, since I was too busy worrying about what I would say to explain myself.
Possible Nightmares
(due to jorn and elfy's incessant, never-ending HARPING at me to update the rp blog, i will now try to update it. i'm not gonna do a whole goddamned recap, though, since that's what comics are for. -.-### *sticks her tongue out at them* *NYAA*))
((note: tele and jorn are together now. go figure.))
♈ Starting to worry about Jorn going through the portal so often. Even if he is with the rest of the Airborne, that doesn't mean something bad can happen. And he told me yesterday about a disturbing dream he keeps having... it consists of him being on his way back to see me in Stormwind. He's riding a gryphon when he gets shot down by a fel cannon. (and I hate to admit that I still don't know what that is) He lands and fights some fel orcs on the ground, eventually getting pinned to the ground with an orc about to plunge his sword into him. Then he wakes up.
I usually don't pay too terribly much attention to peoples' dreams, but still. It's different when it's actually possible.
((note: tele and jorn are together now. go figure.))
♈ Starting to worry about Jorn going through the portal so often. Even if he is with the rest of the Airborne, that doesn't mean something bad can happen. And he told me yesterday about a disturbing dream he keeps having... it consists of him being on his way back to see me in Stormwind. He's riding a gryphon when he gets shot down by a fel cannon. (and I hate to admit that I still don't know what that is) He lands and fights some fel orcs on the ground, eventually getting pinned to the ground with an orc about to plunge his sword into him. Then he wakes up.
I usually don't pay too terribly much attention to peoples' dreams, but still. It's different when it's actually possible.
Stuck in a Box
♈ So much stuff has been going on since I got this damn journal back that I haven't had time to write in it! Anyways:
After I got my journal back, Elfy and I were on even terms, he probably thought. Wrong. I went into his house and grabbed some papers of his, which I promptly hid in the Royal Library, y'know, thinking they would be there when I decided to give them back to him. Wrong. I went in there, being dragged along by him, and had my face slammed into the shelves several times as he carried me along them, looking for the book I had hidden them in. Apparently, though, as it turns out, someone had checked out the book. So he took me back to his house and hung me from the ceiling, letting me just barely stand on a crate underneath me. He kept putting some sort of weird stuff on me that made me itch, eventually putting me into a wooden crate. Then Defas showed up, haven't seen him for a long time, and talked to Elfy for a while. He eventually waited til Elfy left before he made me pay him to let me out of the damn box. What a bunch of jackasses.
After I got my journal back, Elfy and I were on even terms, he probably thought. Wrong. I went into his house and grabbed some papers of his, which I promptly hid in the Royal Library, y'know, thinking they would be there when I decided to give them back to him. Wrong. I went in there, being dragged along by him, and had my face slammed into the shelves several times as he carried me along them, looking for the book I had hidden them in. Apparently, though, as it turns out, someone had checked out the book. So he took me back to his house and hung me from the ceiling, letting me just barely stand on a crate underneath me. He kept putting some sort of weird stuff on me that made me itch, eventually putting me into a wooden crate. Then Defas showed up, haven't seen him for a long time, and talked to Elfy for a while. He eventually waited til Elfy left before he made me pay him to let me out of the damn box. What a bunch of jackasses.
An "Eventful Time"
♈ It’s been a rather eventful time lately. I can’t remember where my journal last left off, but I’ll write in what’s been going on lately. I guess a place to start would be the fact that Elfy and Avenn were yanked into Illidan’s control, creating two very powerful enemies. Gan was taken by them too. They did terrible things to him... I’m still not sure who or what did it to him, but he was infused with demonic power. I had trouble recognizing him at first when I saw him after that had happened, but by his scent there was no mistaking it was him. The Illidari, he told me, had wanted him to kill me as proof of his loyalty. They made the mistake of not demanding my head to be brought in as a trophy, though. All they asked for was a vial of blood. (which was hard enough to get Gan to take, since he was trying to stick with his promise of never harming me) A while after that, a fight broke out between the Illidari (plus Gan) and some of my friends. I usually don’t get afraid during fights, but it really did scare me how passive and uncaring Avenn had become. It was painful to think that this was my brother, even though he wasn’t exactly himself. And Gan didn’t really take much part in the fighting, which was lucky for us, since if he had, then we’d have been in for a world of hurt. I mean really, he’s strong enough without the fel powers!
Later though, I managed to meet him in Zangarmarsh. He told me of how he was faking his allegiance to the Illidari, which I figured he was, but was still happy to hear it from him. He assured me of the chance to save Elfy and Avenn, too, which was more good news. Even though it was only ideas on how to do so, and hope to do so, it was good enough for me.
There’s been two other problems, though. For one thing, since I’ve been running around Outland so much, my amulet which helps protect against moonlight was stolen from me. I think I lost it in Tuurem while fighting one of those broken guys. Another problem, though, is a bit worse than that. (and hopefully no one will find this, since I WILL write this) I was snooping around Stratholme once, and it was empty, oddly enough. So as I was looking around through some crates of old supplies, I happened to realize someone behind me. I turned around, and there was the Baron on his horse. He asked me for a reason to not kill me right there on the spot, and, being the idiot that I am when I think quickly, I told him that he shouldn’t kill an ally. He thought I was lying, of course, but then I made up a bullshit story about going to Naxxramas, meeting with someone there, and swearing allegiance to the scourge. He told me he could just go ask to see if it was true, but I stopped him with the whole “I don’t think you wanna do that, seeing as I have a higher rank than you” thing to slow him down. He must have been in a good mood that day, (which I don’t know if undead can even have) and burned a mark onto me that would cause the undead to follow my command. I guess it was some sort of symbol of him, but when I tried it out, it actually worked! Once again, I still can’t believe he actually bought my story. Seriously, though, I’ll try to only use this command over them when I need it, since after the first time I tested it, I started to feel odd. I saw my reflection in one of the plagued lakes there, and saw that my skin had paled and my eyes had started to look tired. I do want to know what I would have to do to get rid of this sort of foothold the Scourge now has on me, but I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.
It’s amazing, though. As I said earlier, Gan had told me there was a chance to save Avenn. It happened, it really happened! He had revealed himself to be a betrayer of the Illidari, and while he did so, he stole some sort of time-turning charm. It took some work on some spellcasters’ parts, but at Caer Darrow, Avenn’s timeline had apparently been undone, unraveled, I guess. But now there’s a different problem, as always. There are three, THREE different versions of Avenn now: his good side, his bad side, and his physical form. Each part is one third of the power of him as a whole, though, so it works out well when dealing with his bad side, but his good side is quick to tire and not very strong.
But even though Avenn’s been freed, Gan has... taken a turn for the worse. He had been fighting off Elfy during the unraveling, and eventually both was defeated and worn out by his use of power. I fell so stupid, though, since the fight took place in the Plaguelands, where I used the force of undead to fend off some other Illidari guy. I hardly even noticed that Gan had fallen. How could I not notice that? How could I be so unemotional at the sight of that? Of course it hit me after a while what had just happened, but it just proves that the Scourge is hardly an ally when it comes to this.
After the fight, and after the Illidari had left through a portal, we were left with Avenn’s good side and Gan’s body. I won’t deny the fact that I cried on Gan. Hopefully he somehow knew that I was there and that I had wished it didn’t happen... But anyways, as everyone was recovering from the fight, Elfy came back into the area through another portal. He assured us that he was in control of himself, (which took some convincing) and helped get Gan back to Stormwind. We all thought about where he should be buried, where he would wanted to have been buried, at least, and at that point I remembered when I met his father. His adopted father, actually, a Dwarf. It seemed logical to take Gan to Dun Morogh so he would be back where he had grown up.
We brought him to the highest peak in that snow-covered land, where he could be closer to the sky, yet still be on the earth below. The mage there (I can’t remember his name) made a tomb of ice around Gan. It’s beautiful, really; a deep blue monument that you can see into. Many people came to pay respects, but I hardly paid attention to what they were all saying. All I could do was sit there and try to comprehend what had happened, and why my beloved was dead. I knew how it had happened, of course, since I was there, but... All the events leading up to it seemed to be impossible to understand. Intangible.
After everyone had said some words, they decided to leave. Elfy asked me if I was leaving. There was no way in hell I was going to leave, though. So he stayed there with me. Still coming to terms with it, I transformed, feeling safer and more comfortable in my worgen form. Being human just wasn’t good at that time. I curled up by the tomb and stared into it, still thinking over what had happened. I started to get angry with myself. Why hadn’t I done more to try to prevent this? What could I have done? Surely there was something I could have done differently to change everything. But it was too late. There was nothing I could do. It was over.
Avenn came by after a while, seeing the grave for himself. He saw me laying next to it and asked if I was going to be there all night. Maybe he was joking, but I wasn’t when I told him I wouldn’t leave. He told me to get up. I refused. So being the big brother he is, he picked me up, hoisted me over his shoulder, and carried me away from it. I was throwing a fit the whole time, of course. I kicked and screamed and yelled at him and everything else, but he and Elfy eventually dragged me over to a bunker at the airport. I can’t believe it. They tied me to a chair, for god’s sakes! They figured I was hungry, so they got some food to give to me. I was hungry, yeah, but I was sort of in an insolent bitch mode and wouldn’t eat. I ended up getting food stuffed in my face. Thanks a lot, guys. I’m not really mad, of course, it’s just that was sort of the last thing I needed at that moment. Or maybe it was a good thing they forced me to get my mind off Gan. Who knows?
Elfy, who was in control of himself for an uncertain amount of time, asked Avenn about some sort of thing upstairs. I think they thought I couldn’t hear them... But I hear everything. Elfy got a seal put on him by Avenn, helping him maintain control for a while longer.
I just realized how much I’ve written... I’d say it’s time for bed now... I can’t think very well right now anyways.
Later though, I managed to meet him in Zangarmarsh. He told me of how he was faking his allegiance to the Illidari, which I figured he was, but was still happy to hear it from him. He assured me of the chance to save Elfy and Avenn, too, which was more good news. Even though it was only ideas on how to do so, and hope to do so, it was good enough for me.
There’s been two other problems, though. For one thing, since I’ve been running around Outland so much, my amulet which helps protect against moonlight was stolen from me. I think I lost it in Tuurem while fighting one of those broken guys. Another problem, though, is a bit worse than that. (and hopefully no one will find this, since I WILL write this) I was snooping around Stratholme once, and it was empty, oddly enough. So as I was looking around through some crates of old supplies, I happened to realize someone behind me. I turned around, and there was the Baron on his horse. He asked me for a reason to not kill me right there on the spot, and, being the idiot that I am when I think quickly, I told him that he shouldn’t kill an ally. He thought I was lying, of course, but then I made up a bullshit story about going to Naxxramas, meeting with someone there, and swearing allegiance to the scourge. He told me he could just go ask to see if it was true, but I stopped him with the whole “I don’t think you wanna do that, seeing as I have a higher rank than you” thing to slow him down. He must have been in a good mood that day, (which I don’t know if undead can even have) and burned a mark onto me that would cause the undead to follow my command. I guess it was some sort of symbol of him, but when I tried it out, it actually worked! Once again, I still can’t believe he actually bought my story. Seriously, though, I’ll try to only use this command over them when I need it, since after the first time I tested it, I started to feel odd. I saw my reflection in one of the plagued lakes there, and saw that my skin had paled and my eyes had started to look tired. I do want to know what I would have to do to get rid of this sort of foothold the Scourge now has on me, but I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.
It’s amazing, though. As I said earlier, Gan had told me there was a chance to save Avenn. It happened, it really happened! He had revealed himself to be a betrayer of the Illidari, and while he did so, he stole some sort of time-turning charm. It took some work on some spellcasters’ parts, but at Caer Darrow, Avenn’s timeline had apparently been undone, unraveled, I guess. But now there’s a different problem, as always. There are three, THREE different versions of Avenn now: his good side, his bad side, and his physical form. Each part is one third of the power of him as a whole, though, so it works out well when dealing with his bad side, but his good side is quick to tire and not very strong.
But even though Avenn’s been freed, Gan has... taken a turn for the worse. He had been fighting off Elfy during the unraveling, and eventually both was defeated and worn out by his use of power. I fell so stupid, though, since the fight took place in the Plaguelands, where I used the force of undead to fend off some other Illidari guy. I hardly even noticed that Gan had fallen. How could I not notice that? How could I be so unemotional at the sight of that? Of course it hit me after a while what had just happened, but it just proves that the Scourge is hardly an ally when it comes to this.
After the fight, and after the Illidari had left through a portal, we were left with Avenn’s good side and Gan’s body. I won’t deny the fact that I cried on Gan. Hopefully he somehow knew that I was there and that I had wished it didn’t happen... But anyways, as everyone was recovering from the fight, Elfy came back into the area through another portal. He assured us that he was in control of himself, (which took some convincing) and helped get Gan back to Stormwind. We all thought about where he should be buried, where he would wanted to have been buried, at least, and at that point I remembered when I met his father. His adopted father, actually, a Dwarf. It seemed logical to take Gan to Dun Morogh so he would be back where he had grown up.
We brought him to the highest peak in that snow-covered land, where he could be closer to the sky, yet still be on the earth below. The mage there (I can’t remember his name) made a tomb of ice around Gan. It’s beautiful, really; a deep blue monument that you can see into. Many people came to pay respects, but I hardly paid attention to what they were all saying. All I could do was sit there and try to comprehend what had happened, and why my beloved was dead. I knew how it had happened, of course, since I was there, but... All the events leading up to it seemed to be impossible to understand. Intangible.
After everyone had said some words, they decided to leave. Elfy asked me if I was leaving. There was no way in hell I was going to leave, though. So he stayed there with me. Still coming to terms with it, I transformed, feeling safer and more comfortable in my worgen form. Being human just wasn’t good at that time. I curled up by the tomb and stared into it, still thinking over what had happened. I started to get angry with myself. Why hadn’t I done more to try to prevent this? What could I have done? Surely there was something I could have done differently to change everything. But it was too late. There was nothing I could do. It was over.
Avenn came by after a while, seeing the grave for himself. He saw me laying next to it and asked if I was going to be there all night. Maybe he was joking, but I wasn’t when I told him I wouldn’t leave. He told me to get up. I refused. So being the big brother he is, he picked me up, hoisted me over his shoulder, and carried me away from it. I was throwing a fit the whole time, of course. I kicked and screamed and yelled at him and everything else, but he and Elfy eventually dragged me over to a bunker at the airport. I can’t believe it. They tied me to a chair, for god’s sakes! They figured I was hungry, so they got some food to give to me. I was hungry, yeah, but I was sort of in an insolent bitch mode and wouldn’t eat. I ended up getting food stuffed in my face. Thanks a lot, guys. I’m not really mad, of course, it’s just that was sort of the last thing I needed at that moment. Or maybe it was a good thing they forced me to get my mind off Gan. Who knows?
Elfy, who was in control of himself for an uncertain amount of time, asked Avenn about some sort of thing upstairs. I think they thought I couldn’t hear them... But I hear everything. Elfy got a seal put on him by Avenn, helping him maintain control for a while longer.
I just realized how much I’ve written... I’d say it’s time for bed now... I can’t think very well right now anyways.
Syndicate Troubles
* This entry has been written in a different style of handwriting than that of the rest of the journal. At the top can be found a note in the regular handwriting, saying "This one was written by Gan, since I don't remember most of what happened. *
| I was hanging around the moonwell one afternoon, wondering where Teleia was, when a man with an orange mask came up to me and started asking if I was looking for some one...
| I turned around to face him, and nodded to him. He started to talk about having a young girl captive, and I was gripped by a sudden fear. I asked him who, as I knew several girls, and then insulted him while I was at it. He said it was a girl with strange ears, and I nearly panicked.
| I reached out, and grabbed him, asking where she was. He refused, and merely asked if I had the money. I revealed to him one of my clawed, platemail fingers. I pointed to down to where his little friends where, and told him if he didn't tell me, he'd lose those. The goon was most cooperative after that, telling me she was in an abandoned town in the Alteracs. His reward for his help? Broken nose, bruised forhead, and a nut-cracker.
| I jumped on my horse, and rode to the Gryphon Master of Stormwind, Dungar Longdrink. I bought a ride to Hillsbrad, and on Arrival, mounted, and began riding as fast as I could. Upon finding the town, I dismounted, and held my chest a moment... some odd pain starting up deep in it.
| I strode into the town, watching the Syndicate move deeper into the shadows. It seemed I intimidated them. One ofthe rogues attempted to go in the Inn, and warn the others, but I wouldn't let that happen.I pulled out my Venom-Axe, and threw it at him. It went deep into his right shoulder, and he turned around to eye me in fear. I charged at him, and slammed him into the wall.
| Once I was in the inn, I saw several of the Outlaws retreat upstairs, leaving me with three. I attacked the three, and soon lost myself to berserk rage. After I delt with the them, I ran upstairs, where six more Syndicate awaited me, guarding a room wherr I saw a long, blond haired man holding Teleia up. She was naked, wounded, and has silver adornaments.
| The man tried to kiss Teleia, and licked her neck. I then fully lost it. From then, all I remember was fighting, blood, and rage. The next I remember, I was covered in wounds, weak, and surrounded by bodies. Teleia was on the floor, and I stood over her. A look behind me, revealed the man mutilated, arms, legs, and lower jaw cut off.
| I turned my attention back to Teleia. I eyed her naked form, but was far too worried and wounded to have felt any arousing feelings. I helped her out of the silver ornaments, and broke the silver collar she wore. I then reached into my pack, and gave her my leathers. She was awake by then, but still weak. I talked to her, and asked one thing... What they did to her. She responded.
| My fears were realised, they had violated, and raped her. The woman I loved. Had been raped by the evil bastards I had so much trouble with in the past. I entered another rage, turning back to the man. He was still alive. I forced a healing potion down his "throat". I then lost it fully. The next I remember, she man was burned in Fel-fire, a Fel Reaver power core held in my hands. I turned back to Teleia, and held her. She calmed me. We stayed there, for a bit longer. . . . . .
| I was hanging around the moonwell one afternoon, wondering where Teleia was, when a man with an orange mask came up to me and started asking if I was looking for some one...
| I turned around to face him, and nodded to him. He started to talk about having a young girl captive, and I was gripped by a sudden fear. I asked him who, as I knew several girls, and then insulted him while I was at it. He said it was a girl with strange ears, and I nearly panicked.
| I reached out, and grabbed him, asking where she was. He refused, and merely asked if I had the money. I revealed to him one of my clawed, platemail fingers. I pointed to down to where his little friends where, and told him if he didn't tell me, he'd lose those. The goon was most cooperative after that, telling me she was in an abandoned town in the Alteracs. His reward for his help? Broken nose, bruised forhead, and a nut-cracker.
| I jumped on my horse, and rode to the Gryphon Master of Stormwind, Dungar Longdrink. I bought a ride to Hillsbrad, and on Arrival, mounted, and began riding as fast as I could. Upon finding the town, I dismounted, and held my chest a moment... some odd pain starting up deep in it.
| I strode into the town, watching the Syndicate move deeper into the shadows. It seemed I intimidated them. One ofthe rogues attempted to go in the Inn, and warn the others, but I wouldn't let that happen.I pulled out my Venom-Axe, and threw it at him. It went deep into his right shoulder, and he turned around to eye me in fear. I charged at him, and slammed him into the wall.
| Once I was in the inn, I saw several of the Outlaws retreat upstairs, leaving me with three. I attacked the three, and soon lost myself to berserk rage. After I delt with the them, I ran upstairs, where six more Syndicate awaited me, guarding a room wherr I saw a long, blond haired man holding Teleia up. She was naked, wounded, and has silver adornaments.
| The man tried to kiss Teleia, and licked her neck. I then fully lost it. From then, all I remember was fighting, blood, and rage. The next I remember, I was covered in wounds, weak, and surrounded by bodies. Teleia was on the floor, and I stood over her. A look behind me, revealed the man mutilated, arms, legs, and lower jaw cut off.
| I turned my attention back to Teleia. I eyed her naked form, but was far too worried and wounded to have felt any arousing feelings. I helped her out of the silver ornaments, and broke the silver collar she wore. I then reached into my pack, and gave her my leathers. She was awake by then, but still weak. I talked to her, and asked one thing... What they did to her. She responded.
| My fears were realised, they had violated, and raped her. The woman I loved. Had been raped by the evil bastards I had so much trouble with in the past. I entered another rage, turning back to the man. He was still alive. I forced a healing potion down his "throat". I then lost it fully. The next I remember, she man was burned in Fel-fire, a Fel Reaver power core held in my hands. I turned back to Teleia, and held her. She calmed me. We stayed there, for a bit longer. . . . . .
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Spinning thoughts
♈ My head's still spinning about this whole ordeal. I just don't know what to think about it. Being with Xzorn made me feel so safe... I used to feel safe with Nide, but he hasn't been around, so maybe that's why I've been a bit edgy lately. But still, I don't understand how I could let this happen! It doesn't make any sense! I can't be in love with him! I just can't!! The whole time I was kissing him, though it was only a moment, my conscience kept running all these thoughts through my head. "What're you doing?! This is so wrong! It's Xzorn, for god's sake! What about Nide?! What if he finds out?! How could you let this shit happen?! Don't let him break your heart! Don't be so naive! He'll just leave you as a victim!! Don't be his trophy! You know it's all he wants!! Get his hands off of you!! You're such a slut!!!!"
Am I just getting weak? Am I giving in? Do I just want to believe him? I just feel sick. I don't know what to think of all this. Most of my life has been all about gaining control. Control of my powers, control of my life... But now, it seems like all that was for nothing. I can't even control my own fucking emotions.
Am I just getting weak? Am I giving in? Do I just want to believe him? I just feel sick. I don't know what to think of all this. Most of my life has been all about gaining control. Control of my powers, control of my life... But now, it seems like all that was for nothing. I can't even control my own fucking emotions.
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